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Charlotte Amalie
Sunday, July 3, 2022
HomeNewsArchivesCoach Paradise: Checking in a Year Later About a Payback Question

Coach Paradise: Checking in a Year Later About a Payback Question

Dear Coach Paradise,
I just had to write and let you know what has happened since I wrote a year ago.
At that time I had just had a mastectomy and was recovering from treatment for breast cancer. I am happy to report that all is well. My question, at that time, concerned how best to spend the money that was raised by my friends — after paying medical bills I had some left, and it was making me uncomfortable. I wondered if I should give it back, donate it to a good cause or hold on to it. Your answer suggested that the perfect way to "pay it forward" would show up and you told me not to worry but to go with my gut feelings and do "what feels best to you" — a sign that my action would be "in alignment with what really matters."
Well, I have a neighbor in her 70s who asked if I could drive her to the local hospital to visit her son. He is very ill and it is important that she goes on a regular basis. I said "of course," and have been driving her several times a week for a few weeks now. She keeps telling me that she wants to pay me, as a cab would cost her quite a bit. I have kept putting her off until I remembered my dilemma and your advice.
The last time she took out her wallet and was about to pressure me to take her money, I decided to tell her what had happened to me. I shared that driving her seemed like the perfect way to "pay it forward" and to do something for someone, as my friends had done for me. She got it and put her money away. It just felt so right to me that I had to let you know, especially as you ended your reply with "let me know what you decide." You were so right that the opportunity would just show up. Ain't life grand!
Once again, "Ain't it great to be alive"?
Dear Ain't it great,
I am smiling as I write this note to thank you for sharing how your dilemma was solved (as opposed to how you solved your dilemma). Isn't the universe just amazing? Once we put out our intention, let it go and stay open, the answer always shows up.
I love how you didn't have to run around organizing, fixing or doing anything in particular except putting it out there that you would like to demonstrate your gratitude through some action. It sounds like you didn't have to go far, and that your simple service of driving your neighbor to see her son arose from the same generosity from which you benefited last year. I am also sure that above and beyond the transportation, your company and compassion are healing and more meaningful than you will ever know.
I love to hear the next chapters and "what happened," so I really appreciate your keeping me in mind and sending me the solution as a followup to the problem. I am glad that you are well and enjoying paying it forward.
To your generosity of spirit,
Coach Paradise
Editor's note: Coach Paradise (AKA Anne Nayer), Professional Life Coach, is a member of the International Coaching Federation, an MSW clinical social worker-psychotherapist and a medical case manager with 30 years experience working with people of all shapes, sizes and challenges. For further information about her services, call 774-4355, visit her website or email her.

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Dear Coach Paradise,
I just had to write and let you know what has happened since I wrote a year ago.
At that time I had just had a mastectomy and was recovering from treatment for breast cancer. I am happy to report that all is well. My question, at that time, concerned how best to spend the money that was raised by my friends -- after paying medical bills I had some left, and it was making me uncomfortable. I wondered if I should give it back, donate it to a good cause or hold on to it. Your answer suggested that the perfect way to "pay it forward" would show up and you told me not to worry but to go with my gut feelings and do "what feels best to you" -- a sign that my action would be "in alignment with what really matters."
Well, I have a neighbor in her 70s who asked if I could drive her to the local hospital to visit her son. He is very ill and it is important that she goes on a regular basis. I said "of course," and have been driving her several times a week for a few weeks now. She keeps telling me that she wants to pay me, as a cab would cost her quite a bit. I have kept putting her off until I remembered my dilemma and your advice.
The last time she took out her wallet and was about to pressure me to take her money, I decided to tell her what had happened to me. I shared that driving her seemed like the perfect way to "pay it forward" and to do something for someone, as my friends had done for me. She got it and put her money away. It just felt so right to me that I had to let you know, especially as you ended your reply with "let me know what you decide." You were so right that the opportunity would just show up. Ain't life grand!
Once again, "Ain't it great to be alive"?
Dear Ain't it great,
I am smiling as I write this note to thank you for sharing how your dilemma was solved (as opposed to how you solved your dilemma). Isn't the universe just amazing? Once we put out our intention, let it go and stay open, the answer always shows up.
I love how you didn't have to run around organizing, fixing or doing anything in particular except putting it out there that you would like to demonstrate your gratitude through some action. It sounds like you didn't have to go far, and that your simple service of driving your neighbor to see her son arose from the same generosity from which you benefited last year. I am also sure that above and beyond the transportation, your company and compassion are healing and more meaningful than you will ever know.
I love to hear the next chapters and "what happened," so I really appreciate your keeping me in mind and sending me the solution as a followup to the problem. I am glad that you are well and enjoying paying it forward.
To your generosity of spirit,
Coach Paradise
Editor's note: Coach Paradise (AKA Anne Nayer), Professional Life Coach, is a member of the International Coaching Federation, an MSW clinical social worker-psychotherapist and a medical case manager with 30 years experience working with people of all shapes, sizes and challenges. For further information about her services, call 774-4355, visit her website or email her.